


Can I spend my heat with you?

by JJDeservesBetter



Category: Outer Banks (TV)
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Boys Kissing, Childhood Trauma, Denial of Feelings, Friends With Benefits, Friendship/Love, Holding Hands, Hugs, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, JJ (Outer Banks) Deserves Happiness, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Past Domestic Violence, Sexual Content, Sleeping Together, Threats of Rape/Non-Con
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-02
Updated: 2020-12-19
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:33:47
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,073
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25667494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JJDeservesBetter/pseuds/JJDeservesBetter
Summary: Living in the Outer Banks could be hard, especially if you were a Pogue and if you were an Omega that was way worst. Now, if you were a Pogue and an Omega, well, you were completely fucked, just like JJ was.
Relationships: JJ & John B. Routledge, JJ & Kiara & Pope (Outer Banks), JJ/John B. Routledge
Comments: 7
Kudos: 64





	1. I should just throw you on the fucking street

**Author's Note:**

> Hi  
> So this a work I have on my phone for quite some time and I decided to post  
> This first chapter talks about how JJ feels and what is the deal with his life  
> I try to respect the characters so it's not only porn without history  
> 

Living in the Outer Banks could be hard, especially if you were a Pogue and if you were an Omega that was way worst. Now, if you were a Pogue and an Omega, well, you were completely fucked, just like JJ was.

That’s why JJ hated his life so much, being a Pogue had it’s difficults and all that came with it, since lack of money and hard work for living until passing cold in the winter, but it had also a good side like freedom and the happiness of living in a isle. However, being an Omega was a fucking challenge every single day. Beginning with the fact you wouldn’t know you were an Omega until your first heat came, because poor parents didn’t had the money to pay for laboratory secondary genders exams every year. That alone sucked, but it wasn’t the worst.

For JJ, the worst part was the heats, it was a full mess of hot feelings, sweat and pheromones. It was disgusting, he didn’t liked it neither enjoyed. He was traumatized and kept refusing to let his designation define who he was. All that, because the first time he had a heat he was only fourteen and oblivious about this side of himself.

That first time, he had just gotten back from school when it started. That was also the first time his father had laid a hand on him. His father was an Alpha, a drunk and horrendous Alpha, that didn’t protected or helped his puppy get through his first heat in peace, but instead he punched and kicked him several times while calling him: “slut", “useless", “piece of shit”, “fucking cunt" and telling him “I should just throw you on the fucking street and let someone take you for the bitch you are", “you cant’t even be a fucking beta, you have to be a fucking slut begging for a knot", “you’re a disappointment, a fucking bitch that don’t deserve anything in life" and a lot more than that, but, it was essentially the same. Indeed a horrendous Alpha and father. That night he thought this was his end, that he would be found dead in the morning. 

However, he survived. With three broken ribs, a abnormal purple and green wound that covered most of his chest and stomach, two black eyes, a internal bleeding on his nose, a ruined face with a cracked cheek bone and maybe a hundred different wounds on his body, but he had survived.

He disappeared for four weeks after that night, with the lie of visiting an aunt on the continent. He was hiding to heal and hiding to deal with the fact that he was an Omega. What meant he was able to not only carry children, but also have heats every single month, have the biological need for a knot, be able to produce sweet pheromones and have a weaker body, or at least this was what he had heard until them. He was nothing at the time, but a child, a completely frightened child, an Omega puppy that had just presented and was badly beatted for that.

He decided back at the time, that he wasn’t going to be beatted like that ever again. He decided to never ever let someone have that kind of power over him again. The power to use his gender as a weakness, the power to make him fell small. So, he started to learn how to fight, but that wasn’t enough, he still lived with his father. So, he learned how to avoid him at any cost.

For that to be the only time, he also nedded to hide it away from everyone. Everyone except his friends. They knew, but for the others he was nothing but a Beta. A temperamental and happy, but ready for a fight kind of Beta. He was then, safe. This for him was the only way to remain free.

The freedom he hoped and urged so much, was his most precious thing. The only thing he could be sure. The only thing he now, could protect. Even if he was denied of food or water, his freedom was something he could not live without. This was the life he wanted and the life he would have, at least for now. Because, the tomorrow didn’t belonged to him.

He hid his gender and his identity for all others, except his friends. John B, Kiara and Pope were the only to know. His father was not included in that list. For that list was of people he trusted. His group, his Pogues, his family and pack. They protected and helped him, brought him food and water when he didn’t had any, completed the money to buy his meds when he couldn’t do it alone and most importantly they helped with his heat.

After the first one, he started taking meds, the contraceptive injections and suppressants kind of meds. And like one of JJ's comics character said once, with great powers came great responsibilities, so, for him being an Omega came with great costs. The kind of $3.090 year dollars cost, but, this was a small price for freedom. So, for him the hard work, pain and sleepless nights were worthy to get the money.

Although, being an Omega nowadays was easier than 40 years ago. Now the laws were good for them, they had good suppressants and birth control meds of all kinds. The usual ones were the bimonthly pills, those guaranteed six heats a year and control pills to be taken every day. But, JJ didn’t took them like most people. He took the fourmonthly kind so that he would have only three heats and the birth control injections four times a year, those were not so recommended to be taken for more then two and a half years in a row, but he didn’t cared, he wasn’t most people. He couldn’t afford forgetting a contraceptive pill one day and getting pregnant. Because, for that would be the end of his freedom.

He knew thought, that taking this meds for a long amount of time would probably damage his body permanently, making him less fertile or even completely sterile. Looking forward in the future, maybe he would regret doing all of this to himself, but, for now his freedom was the only thing that mattered for him and he would protect it at all cost, even if it costed his ability to make another life.


	2. Are you free next week?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> JJ wants to be alone, but at the same time he doesn't.   
> He's struggling with himself and with his hormones right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, this took some time but here it is.  
> Enjoy guys ♡♡♡

His heat would start in two or three days, everything was fine, as much as it could be, usually he would go to the boat and lead it to someplace away on the sea, but still close to the isle, only to be alone. 

He would swim during hours, fish, surfe a little and float in the water. Them, he would enter in the cabin and sleep until the fever took him completely. That was the worst part for him, the fever, the hot inside his belly that wouldn’t go away. Unless, that he lost the control and started to touch himself, what was disgusting for him. How could he be such a mess on the inside like this, craving for something that he didn’t even wanted. Craving for an Alpha’s attention. 

Maybe it was the hormones, the feelings he had for some Alphas on school or the trauma he held caused by his father. He was so disgusted for wanting company during his heats, that he decided to close himself even more. Forget about everyone and stay isolated was his rule. But, sometimes he would put this rule aside and ask for company. 

This was one of those times. The boat was broken, so he couldn’t be on the sea and anchored in the other side of the isle for those days. His father was in the house, so he wasn’t going to stay in that place. Pope’s house was off limits and he had a big test coming, so he couldn’t help anyway. Kiara was unavailable at the continent visiting her grandmother. What made John B the only safe choice. 

Although, he didn’t liked this choice so much, because John B, his best friend, was an Alpha. But, he wasn’t afraid that John would do something with him, that he would touch him without him wanting or anything like that. No, that wasn’t the problem. The problem was that John B was an Alpha, a caring and gentle Alpha, too much different from his father. So, he didn’t knew how to deal if it. He didn’t knew how to deal with being around him on heats. Because, he didn’t knew how it would feel to have him around.

Kiara and Pope were both Betas, they had helped him before with heats. They had feed, held and took care of him. But, John had never been with him on those times, he had never spend a heat with him.

He was afraid of the unknown. 

For him the unknown was full of maybes and uncertainly thoughts. Right now, he needed safety, support, love and respect above all. Unknown things are not in his list of priorities. However, John represented safety, support, love and respect for him. He was a good person and he would always help him. He was the one to stand by his side in every occasion. He was also the oldest friend he had in life. He was his anchor.

So, against all the odds he eat his fears and regrets, picked his phone from his pocket and messaged John B. “Are you free next week?”. If God was good, John would be free to help him, so he wouldn’t spend his heat alone in a strange place. _Please be free, be free_. Eleven minutes of pure anxiety passed before John B simply typed back for him “Yeah. Why bro?”. _FUCK, okay chill, it’s John, it’s your John, he is okay_.

He was afraid of asking, afraid of the unknown. He wanted to run away and hide. But, he wanted to be by John’s side too. He breathed hard before writing, the only thing he had never asked an Alpha before. “Can I spend my heat with you?”. _Now it’s done, no going back from here boy._

Maybe John would reject him, no, John would never reject him, or would he? JJ didn’t knew. He was afraid of being alone this time. He wanted to be held. He wanted it to be John B by his side. Deep inside he wanted it. But, only the thought of being rejected made his heart darker. This was his fear, his most deeply and sacred fear. Give himself only to be left aside.

His heart was racing and his cheeks blushed hard when he saw the instantly reply John gave to him “Of course you can, whatever you need I’m here for it, I’m always here for you Jay". _Oh shit_. His brain froze, he wasn’t being rejected. He was being treated good, being invited and it was an Alpha doing it. This was new and strange for him, but, not so quite. John had always treated him that way, he was his John after all. His best friend, one of his Pogues, his family and his pack. He was an Alpha, but he was also the one to always stand with him. 

He knew that John would never abandon him in a time like this, or any time actually. His brain was yelling for him to get away from this Alpha and the feelings that were growing inside of him, he was terrified of being with an Alpha. But, his heart was craving for the warmth of another, for the feeling of being held by John’s hands and for the desire of belonging. He was desperately anxious for meeting him, so, he texted him back “Thank you, I’ll drop by when it starts” and for that John only replied “Kay, see you". _Holy shit._

He was sweating his feelings right now, everything inside of him was boiling. He knew that John would take care of him, treat him good and make sure he was okay, but, there was a part of him that held fear for that meeting. A part that was damaged, a part that remembers the way it felt to be around an Alpha when he was in heat. That part of him was terrified. He didn’t wanted to feel like that ever again, he didn’t wanted to be treated like that ever again. _It’s okay, it’s going to be okay, you’re okay, you’re good_. On that moment, the panic attack was starting to form on the base of his throat. His father had engraved a trauma on his soul that he would always carry with him. A trauma that made him tremble with only the thought of being around him again.

He breathed hard as he felt the tears going down his face. His eyes burned and he was feeling lost. He locked his bedroom door, got on his bed and sunked on the blankets. A river of sweet water was flowing through his pillow. He hated feeling like that, powerless, small and fragile. That was the most humiliating thing for him, crying over his feelings. The feelings that came with the pre-heat, his Omega feelings. His true feelings. The ones he always denied, for fear and guilt.

_Calm down. Calm down. Calm down. Stop thinking._ His thoughts were almost making him loose his mind when the tiredness finally got him, leading to a night full of dreams and wonders.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Remembering that english is not my mother language, so, have mercy on me.  
> Leave some thoughts down below with you want and thank you ♡♡♡♡


	3. I'll be good I promise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Big John just wants to calm his son and help John understand how to be good

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well this took long hahaha  
> I kind of stopped writing but insomnia kept me awake and here it is  
> I hope you guys enjoy it

“Holy Fuck" John breathed out after replying to JJ, realizing what he had just done. “Oh my GOD, HOLY FUCK" he shouted dropping his phone on the bed and getting up. “What the hell did I just agree to?” he said passing his hands through his hair. He was confused and shocked, but ultimately freezed. His friend had just asked to spend a heat with him and he accepted. He had just said yes to one of the most private things in the world. After all why wouldn’t he, this was JJ, his Jay. But, it was JJ at the same time and that made everything confusing. Because he was his friend and what was he supposed to do now. “What did I do?” He whispered to himself. “Birdie? You okay in there?” his father called him while entering his bedroom.

“Dad, hey, hi..” he responded a little too agitated for his usual self. He was startled processing. Big John stepped closer to his son and slightly pressed his hand on his forehead and them on his left cheek “Birdie? Did something happened? You’re pale”. John looked at him and calmed himself before responding, his dad’s presence aalways calmed him since he was little. “I’m fine dad, just.. something strange happened”. His father looked him and sighed in relief, he had filled himself with worry for a second “Okay, right, come here tell me what happened son” he told John while guiding him to sit on bed by his side.

Big John was usually distant from everything after his mother had left them, losing his so loved wife had been a shock to him, but being parted from his bounded Omega because she had found another Alpha and decided that she wanted another family away from her current Alpha and puppy, well that hurted like hell and it burned his soul every day. However, when it came to John, he was there and he did everything he could for him, for his son he would do anything.

“Dad" John called breaking the silence and looking at him, confusion in his face “How is it to share a heat with someone?” he asked. Big John had soft eyes, he after all knew how it was to be asked that “Oh birdie, did someone asked you that?”. “Yeah, a friend of mine" John said, the last part a whisper, because his dad didn’t knew about JJ and he couldn’t talk about him for anyone. They had a sacred promise.

Big John worried about his teenage son, his Alpha son passing a heat with an Omega, he knew his little bird was a gentle soul, but this could still be a risk “Okay.. and is this friend of yours only a friend?” he asked. “What?” John asked back before understanding the question and replaying readjusting himself on the bed “Oh.. no no, dad it’s not like that, he is my friend y’know, he is a good friend of mine and that’s it. At least it was.. I mean I don’t know anymore after what he asked, because he never asked anything like this and...” he was saying too fast, passing words, clearly nervous. So Big John interrupted him raising his hands making a sign for him to calm down “Okay okay, hold on boy, I get it you’re nervous, but hey little bird it’s okay, I’m here so talk to me, tell me about your friend, how is he?”.

“Sorry dad" John sighed and started talking, smiling nervously “I’m just a little shaked y’know, I mean it took me by surprise" he started messing with a leather band he had on his wrist, trying to calm himself “Me and him, we're friends, and I really like him, fuck I love him, his my friend and everything else, but we never had anything". “Okay, keep going Birdie" Big John said, listening carefully to his son. “I know that he passed some heats with some friends and that they took care of him, but I was never there. Never. I don’t know how to act around him, so I always stayed away y’know”. “Yeah, I get it son". “And now he asked me to spend his heat with me and I said yes, because he is my friend and I care about him, but I don’t know what I have agreed to dad" he finished saying raising his head to look at his father’s face.

Big John smiled softly “Oh birdie, I think you’re overthinking it son, your friend asked you to help him and you’ve said yes”. “I know dad, but..” Big John cutted him “Let me finish first” John smiled and said back “Yeah yeah sorry, go on".

“I know that you are thinking like an Alpha about this, and seeing your friend like the Omega he is, but you need to separate things. First think about your friend alright, he is an Omega going into heat, so he needs support. Second it’s not like you’re thinking son, sharing a heat is about compromise and being caring, not always about sex”. And like magic John blushed hard after hearing what his father had just said, but he didn’t dared to stop him, because he was making sense.

“Look, do you remember when your mother was in heat and we would help her build a nest and make her company and she would take you in her arms, sing and hug you all night, well that’s because she was happy. Because that John was a healthy heat, and you know that. You remember birdie” He paused to put his hand on John’s shoulder “I know it may sound scary to not know what will happen, but the only thing you have to worry about is taking care of your friend. Make sure he feels safe and comfortable. Give him things to build a nest if he wants to. Give him water and food. And do as he asks, okay?” And after hearing everything John nodded and agreed with his father’s words.

Big John took his face in his hands and said very carefully to John “If he tells you that he needs you to leave him alone, you will do it okay, you will walk away from him and leave him alone until he calls you back”. John nodded. “If he tells you that he needs you to hold him, you will hold him and nothing more, do you get it?” John nodded again. “And if he tells you to help him _that way_ , John listen to me okay, even that you want to help him, you can’t do it. Because he will be in heat don’t forget that, he is in heat and you need consent, do you get it?”. John swallowed dry and nodded slowly. “Talk to him before the heat strikes and ask him about everything, I know it can be uncomfortable, but you need to know his limits, you need to know what to do and to not do. So talk to him Johnathan Booker and learn his limitations, ask for his consent before anything happens. Do. You. Understand. Me?” He talked slow and precisely every word. He didn’t wanted his son to do anything that he would regret forever.

John nodded and said “Yes father”. Big John took a heavy breath and hugged his son saying “I know you will be good little bird, I know you won’t hurt him, I know that” He released John from his embrace and looked back at him “But John, if you feel at any moment that his smell is getting too strong for you to handle, get away, get calm, and than get back. Take care of him, like we did it for your mother, be gentle and caring birdie above all”. Big John was not the father he wanted to be, but he could sense the distress coming from his puppy, so he wanted to calm him. However like everyone, he had heard the news and stories about Alphas that had raped and attacked Omegas in heat, he knew that his son was not like this, but it was still his job to teach him. That he could do as a father.

“I got it dad, I’ll help him, I will be good to him, and I won’t do anything that he doesn’t want, I get it. Make him comfortable and safe like we did with mom” He said confident, but whispered the mention of his mother. “I’ll be good I promise".

“Oh birdie" he hugged his son one last time “I know you’ll be baby bird, I know”. They stayed like that for some time, until Big John had to get up and head out of home, he was going to be out of isle for some time, doing jobs on the continent.

* * *

Later that night John was on his bed, laying on his side looking outside the window. He was desperate after the message he received from JJ, but his father had talked to him. He thought now that he was stupid, because the first thing he could think was about sex and not about taking care of JJ. How could he be so clueless about it.

JJ wanted to be safe during it, he knew how bad his friend hated his heats and how he avoided being around people. So for him to ask his company, he was desperate for safety. And even knowing all this, the first thing that came to his mind was sex. John felt stupid and terrible.

He blamed himself for being selfish and clueless, but he forgot that it was okay to be like that. After all, he was just a teenager. That had only being with his mother during her heats when he was a child. Now he was a teen, full of hormones that heard the word heat and associated it with sex. Like everyone of his age does.

So, he ended sending a message for JJ and turning his phone off so he could sleep. That night he dreamt about being held by his mother once again.

* * *

JJ had woken that night after 3 AM from a nightmare full of rejection and hurt. So he went to swin at the sea by the moon light to calm himself, now that he couldn’t get himself to sleep. When he went to catch his shirt and phone from the sand he saw the text that John had sent to him. “Thanks for trusting me to take care of you”.

Like a pass of magic JJ’s world got bright and lighter, so he smiled, truly smiled for the first time in a long time. Because, he went to sleep first that night afraid of everything, but now, with nine words from John he could start seeing colors again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading so far  
> Feel free to leave a comment or kudos on my work  
> ♡♡♡♡♡

**Author's Note:**

> Hi guys  
> Hope you have enjoyed it so far  
> Leave a comment below if you can  
> And also English is not my mother language, sorry for any mistakes  
> Feel free to correct me  
> See you soon ♡


End file.
